Ever watch someone else land a job you were sure you’re perfect for? Ever apply for something right up your alley and not hear anything back? Sometimes there are gigs we feel we’re made for and somehow we didn’t convey this to the person doing the hiring. It can be disappointing, for sure. What happens when you find out you didn’t get that "perfect" gig?
Tell yourself it’s nothing personal
The people who are hiring have a responsibility to pick the best person for the job. Whether or not you agree with the decision, it’s nothing personal. Another candidate could have a certain….something you don’t. That doesn’t mean you’re a bad worker or a bad person, it just means you weren’t a right fit for that particular gig.
Allow yourself a few minutes to reflect…but that’s it
It’s good to think about why you didn’t get the job and wonder if there’s anything about the application process or the interview you could have done different. Dwelling on it for more than a few minutes won’t do you any good. Learn from the negative, turn it into something positive, and move on.
Never burn your bridges
Even if you don’t agree with the final decision, don’t tell an employer he’s wrong or send a sarcastic note detailing all the ways he’s lame. You might not have a job today, but that doesn’t mean something won’t open up tomorrow for which he feels you’re perfect. If you didn’t get the gig, say thank you and move on. But do ask to be kept on file for future opportunities.
It’s Ok to be disappointed
It’s normal to be disappointed when you don’t land a gig. Don’t feel bad for feeling bad. Have your moment, buy yourself some Starbucks and get back on your horse. There are still opportunities to be had.
How do you bounce back?
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Speaking of disappointment, I have an announcement to make and I wish I didn’t have to. After I changed domains last fall, I lost a lot of traffic. While the traffic is slowly creeping back up to where it was, revenue has taken a big hit. I’m not even breaking even anymore. I was paying Jodee out of my own pocket but can no longer afford to do so. Thus, I’ve asked Jodee to take a break until things get back to normal.
This in no way reflects Jodee’s work as she’s been a Godsend. She labored tirelessly every day to bring you the jobs from around the Internet and words can’t express my gratitude. Let’s hope this is a temporary setback so Jodee can begin posting again. In the meantime, I hope she’ll continue to be a part of the FWJ community as I will miss seeing her every day.
Also - if you’re hiring, I’m happy to give Jodee a glowing recommendation. She’s the best.
February 29th, 2008 at 12:54 am
Wow - so sorry to hear about that. Assuming the positive, that this is temporary, I know I will look forward to seeing you back soon, Jodee. Will you still come around and post a comment or two?
Deb, I’m crossing my fingers for you.
February 29th, 2008 at 12:59 am
@ Erika: You bet I’ll still stop by and post!
February 29th, 2008 at 1:17 am
Well, I suppose I should quit sending sarcastic note detailing all the ways people are lame when they don’t hire me. Just kidding! I wouldn’t do that. It sounds like a good stress buster though
Actually, I try to always be nice, even when I don’t want to. You never know when a new job will come up with that person. Ranting privately or anonymously is all good though.
Here’s to FWJs getting back to normal. It will, this has always been a great blog and community.
February 29th, 2008 at 3:45 am
Sorry to hear about that! Just for that, I am getting the urge to click on some of the links you have here.
I am certain that things will pick up soon!
As for disappointment, I think I felt more disappointment when I was just starting out. People were not hiring me as I did not have that much experience at the time. Slowly but steadily this situation did change. Now whenever they may be a set-back, I know that something else will come up … well hopefully. LOL
February 29th, 2008 at 4:08 am
I’m sorry to hear that the finances are going poorly. I hope that Jodee will be able to come back soon!
February 29th, 2008 at 5:00 am
When I don’t get a gig, I don’t get a gig. *Shrug* What can you do? There’s no point taking it personally - someone was a better fit, and I’ll be a better fit for someone else.
@ Jodee - Send me your rates.
February 29th, 2008 at 7:29 am
It’s very, very rare that I dwell on a gig I didn’t get. Those times that I did, it was because I spent hours laboring on my cover letter and followed-up a few times afterwards. I only do that when I know the project is tailor-fit for me. But then I don’t delude myself into thinking that I’m one of a kind. There will always be those whose qualifications are the same as mine yet fit a certain gig better than I do. Life goes on.
Jodee, I’ll miss you!
February 29th, 2008 at 7:41 am
I too hope that FWJ returns to normal soon!
On the “bouncing back after disappointment” front, after reading your post I realized that I cope with rejection much easier in my freelancing work than I do with my fiction work. I suppose it makes sense, since I’m more personally attached to my fiction and I’ve only just started freelancing in earnes. Still, though, interesting to realize!
February 29th, 2008 at 8:03 am
James - since you want Jodee to send her your rates, does this mean that you are changing your business to Wo-Men With Pens?
February 29th, 2008 at 8:08 am
Nope. I wear the pants in this family. I do have extra pencils, though…
February 29th, 2008 at 9:19 am
JoDee-am sure this is just a “later” and not a good-bye. Look forward to your presence back here.
Deb-Here’s hoping things pick pack up promptly. I’m sure the ads are your biggest bread and butter, but no reason that those of us with any extra $ around can’t click on the “please help us keep going” links.
Jennifer-I tend toward sarcasm, too. I’ve found that “write a letter you will never send” trick works for me in all sorts of life situations–work and mothers-in-law come to mind. Write it down, get it out, then erase it or tear it up.
February 29th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
@L.L. - Likewise if everyone who came here clicked on an ad just once a visit Deb would probably have more than enough to pay Jodee’s salary.
February 29th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
I hate to be the bleaker side of the coin, but this is also a good way to demonstrate that blogging - in itself - makes no money. Those who launch themselves on the Internet thinking Adsense and ads will make them rich overnight are fooling themselves.
Also, as Deb has shown, blogging to help others is a real job, folks. It’s time consuming, expensive and not easy at all. You’re witnessing a little bit of a reality check from the blogging world.
@ Deb - I am very sorry that this is happening to you, though. Of all the people who deserve to do well, I’d say you’re one of them.
@ Tasha - Good point. I’m going to click something.
February 29th, 2008 at 5:24 pm
@Jodee you’ll be missed, especially by those of us from the Ottawa area, but you may not be gone for long. I’d appreciate seeing you do some posts here to let us know how you are doing.
@Deb I’m certain things will pick up soon and you already know what a “keeper” have in Jodee.
February 29th, 2008 at 5:32 pm
Bouncing Back: I think it certainly becomes easier the longer you freelance or write but it is so true that you should not take it personally. What if every potential employer received 500 + applicantions like James from Tippy Tealeaf had shared with us. You have no choice but to reject 499 others and none of that would have been personal. The right job will come along. You and the job and the employee will all be a good fit. You’ll be happier in a writing job that is suited to you and if you are happy, let’s face it, your family will be too.
@Scribette and @ James Wo-Men-With Pens…Love it!
February 29th, 2008 at 5:43 pm
@ James: You’ve got mail!
@ Everyone else who posted that I will be missed - Thank you.
Even though I won’t be posting job leads for the time being, I still consider myself very much a member of this community and so I will continue to post replies when I have something to contribute.
Deb is an A-1, class act and it’s been a pleasure to work for her (and you guys). We will be keeping in touch, whether she needs me for paying work or not. I am proud to call her a friend as well as a client, but I don’t expect anyone to suffer financially because they are paying me. It just doesn’t make sense.
So I will be a regular lurker (new word?) even if I don’t post something every day. And I will be fine.
Thank you for thinking of me.
February 29th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
Hope to see Jodee back, too.
February 29th, 2008 at 6:44 pm
We must be a bunch of takers. How many thousands of us visit a day and we don’t even support Deb through her ads? Come on people. It’s the least we can do. Support FWJ.
February 29th, 2008 at 7:07 pm
Good morning! I’m sorry Jodee will not be posting the job leads anymore - sorrier still that FWJ is not doing well financially. I certainly appreciate and have benefited from your hard work. Here’s to brighter days!
Regarding disappointment - I don’t find myself getting terribly disappointed when I don’t get a gig - I do however, find myself disappointed when I lose them! In the last two weeks I have lost my two biggest income producers and I have been … disappointed (to say the least)! But I awoke this morning to another offer in my inbox - one I’m excited about, to boot! So I suppose spending too much time being disappointed is a mute point. Things come around, as they will for FWJ. Thanks again for all your hard work.
February 29th, 2008 at 7:29 pm
Don’t know how Deb feels about this, but I know I came across a job lead a while back that I didn’t qualify for, but someone else might have so I sent it directly to Jodee.
If we all did that, and if Deb didn’t mind the flood of emails - it would make her job a TON easier.
February 29th, 2008 at 9:26 pm
Jenny B - Glad you like Wo-Men With Pens! I still think James should consider it … lol
February 29th, 2008 at 9:53 pm
I *am* lacking specific equipment that would qualify me as the site host… Though perhaps I should start a sister spin-off. It’d be nice to tell a woman what to do, for once, instead of the other way around
February 29th, 2008 at 9:56 pm
@ James: Telling a woman what to do would only happen once, LOL!
March 1st, 2008 at 4:09 am
Jodee - it would happen that many times? Once? I’m shocked! LOL
March 1st, 2008 at 4:11 am
PS - I think James is outnumbered on “this here” thread! Just joshing James.
March 1st, 2008 at 4:13 am
I try to pretend I’m the voice of reason in a sea of chaos
March 1st, 2008 at 4:25 am
With “pretend” being the key word. haha [again a joke ... don't wanna get "in trouble" again] LOL
March 1st, 2008 at 5:35 pm
@ Scribette and James: You guys are just too funny!