Martial Arts, Chinese Food…and Computer Repair?

I received a flyer in the mail the other day that was just too funny, on so many levels, not to share.

The top of the flyer said, “Jackie Chan’s Chinese Restaurant.” Fair enough, although I tend to stay away from restaurants that use celebrity names but are not actually affiliated with said celebrities. Mickey Mantle’s restaurant? Let’s go! Wolfgang Puck’s? I’m in.

Something tells me Jackie Chan of movie and martial arts fame has little to do with this place. Because I’m pretty sure Jackie Chan has proofreaders for his marketing materials. Stay with me and you’ll see what I mean.

The flyer continued to advertise “Jackie Chans’s Computer Repair.” I guess it’s good to diversify in today’s economy, but why is there egg foo young in my USB port?

The computer repair portion of the business detailed such services as:

• Computer boots up (This is a problem?)
• Computer slowly (Would you like to buy a verb?)
• Windows Vista (Yes, I can see how this might require repair!)
• Computer virus (Just one?)

But what really sent me on a rant about the flyer (when I finished laughing over “computer slowly”) was the “s’s.” Hypothetically speaking, maybe Jackie Chan owns the restaurant while Jackie Chans (his evil twin?) fixes the computers?

When we analyze it, accepted rules (which, of course, vary by source) for forming a possessive when a name ends in Z, X or S aren’t that easy. Perhaps I shouldn’t blame Mr. Chan, or Mr. Chans, as the case may be.

Basic Rules for using Apostrophe S

First, the basic rules for forming possessive nouns.

• To form the possessive of most nouns, simply add an apostrophe S.

Ex: Did you see the latest post on Deborah Ng’s blog?
Ex: Jackie Chan’s  Chinese Restaurant (Yes, there was something correct on the flyer).

• To form the possessive of a plural noun (when the singular of the noun doesn’t end in S), add only an apostrophe following the S.

Ex: The writers’ blogs on the Freelance Writing Jobs Network are always full of useful information for running a freelance writing business.

Possessive “Rules” that Really Aren’t
But what if a singular noun ends in S, which sometimes happens with names, such as Mr. Chans, computer repairman, or the proverbial Mr. Jones? This is where rules differ according to style and which reference you read.

Strunk & White’s Elements of Style, an authoritative source on grammar and style, says to form the possessive of a singular noun ending in S, add an apostrophe S.

Ex: Mr. Jones’s advice rarely steers me wrong.
I’m somewhat skeptical of Mr. Chans’s computer repair skills. (Interesting, it seems this flyer isn’t as grammatically offensive as it first appeared. If, of course, we accept “Mr. Chans” as a name and not a typo.)

Notable exceptions include ancient names.

EX: Many people believe Jesus’ advice is even better than Mr. Jones’s.

However, popular style uses whatever looks and sounds best, whether the name is modern or ancient. If your tongue stumbles over the “eses” sound when you say the word aloud, it may be best to go with s’.  Similarly, the ‘s is optional when a word ends in z or x — it is correct to simply write: Fox’.

In the case of words ending in S, I prefer this simpler style. It’s cleaner in both speech and written word. If I were Mr. Chans’ copywriter, I’d write: Mr. Chans’ Computer Repair. I’d also recommend he list some benefits in his marketing material, but that’s a topic for another column!

However, I’m inclined to always add the ‘s when a word ends in z or x, although I may not pronounce it.

What about if we have a plural possessive that ends in S, such as the Joneses everyone wants to keep up with? Here, just an apostrophe after the final S will suffice.

Ex: If you want to keep up with the Joneses, be prepared to face the Joneses’ bills.

In some cases when you’re referring to last names, it makes sense to change this to “the Jones family.”

Note: If you’re curious as to whether “family” is a singular or plural noun – it’s singular. But “its” sounded awkward in this sentence, while “their” would have been grammatically incorrect. I substituted “the” to avoid the issue altogether… more on that later!

Before I sign off, I must apologize for the tardiness of this post. I may need to call Mr. Chans, because “my computer slowly.”