March isn’t turning out to be the greatest month for me. As you already know, this blog is struggling financially which kind of puts a bummer on things. A couple of gigs didn’t pan out either. Plus I totally fell behind on just about all of my blogs. I blame a lot of this on my own negativity. Greeting the day with a negative outlook only sets of a nasty chain reaction. I’m a firm believer that positive thinking works wonders.
This past Monday morning I woke up with the attitude that I was going to turn things around, and I did. I kept up a positive mood which inspired me to keep busy. In fact, by last night I was caught up with all my work and I was able to shut down for the evening with enough time left over to hang out with my husband and half watch TV and half read a book. This morning I’m on the same schedule with the same positive outlook and again, the work is flowing.
I really think how you attack the day makes a difference. When you wake up cranky and fight with the kids about getting on the school bus it can set the tone for the entire day.When this happens, try finding ways to create a more positive mind set:
- Go for a nice head-clearing walk
- Do some gardening
- Read
- Call a friend or loved one
- Visit your favorite blogs or social networking sites
Sometimes all we need is a distraction to turn our mood around to something a bit more upbeat. Start your day in a positive mood and watch that positivity stick with you until bed time.
March 26th, 2008 at 8:00 pm
That Law of Attraction stuff really does work. Once I started focusing on what I want (as opposed to the results I don’t want), things have started to get a lot better.
March 26th, 2008 at 8:40 pm
I’m relieved to learn I’m not the only one who wrestles with staying positive. But like you, I’ve found the attitude I have reflects on what I receive in return.
Wishing positive vibes to all. Remember the saying, “Fake it ’til you make it.” There was a time I didn’t believe it worked, but found out differently when I applied it to myself.
March 26th, 2008 at 8:59 pm
Ditto to comments above.
Another suggestion: Excercise helps promote positive feelings — even if you yell at the treadmill while you’re on it. I’m generally in better moods more often after buying a treadmill seven years ago because it enables me to get exercise when outside weather doesn’t permit and there’s no need to go to a health club. Sometimes, just 15 minutes to clear the mind helps.
You may also find value in the (admittedly overpriced) Tony Robbins or other “success” tapes. Personally, I havor Dwayne Dyer (Power of Positive Intentions, etc.). I even donated a significant sum (to me) to public television a few years ago to get some of his exclusive (to public TV) materials and though they were well worth the $300 investment (video, cd, tape and book).
March 26th, 2008 at 9:11 pm
I’ll second Phil’s comment on exercise, but from a different standpoint. I dealt with panic disorder a few years ago. It took three years for a doctor to uncover what was going on (I saw eight doctors in this time frame and NONE Of them thought panic attacks until I brought them up after doing some research.) I got to the point where I was terrified to leave my house because when I did a panic attack occured, especially if I was alone. I wound up clinically depressed on top of it.
Getting out in the fresh air, no matter what the weather is doing is critical for beating anxiety and depression. Even when it is below zero with wind chills of 40 below, I’ll be outside walking at least to the corner. Rain-I carry an umbrella. Wind and rain are the worst and I pretty much opted years ago to just get wet and then come home and shower.
I know when I lost the Sidestep gig, I went into a big of a down spiral, but it definitely worked out in the end. I have more work now than I was expecting and even have a non-paying gig reviewing music CDs that I love. Might not pay in terms of money, but since landing this gig my music spending budget hasn’t been touched and is going towards more important things!
March 26th, 2008 at 9:25 pm
I definitely agree with the power of positive thinking. There are times when it’s difficult–when you send out a killer cover letter and resume for a gig you’re PERFECT for and then hear nothing. But I still wake up every morning, thinking that today is full of possibilities and the day is what we make it. That’s why I tell my kids to MAKE it a great day when I drop them off at school, not to HAVE one.
March 26th, 2008 at 9:48 pm
Ditto to Phil’s comments on exercise and I’ll throw in a nice, hot bubble bath! It does wonders for the psyche (sorry for those who don’t like bubble baths!)
I have found a routine that really helps me stay positive in the mornings and I’ve stuck with it. Some of you may find this helpful and some may not. But, I practice the three P’s - Plan, Prepare, and Pray. This help me stay focused and keeps me positive as I go about my day.
March 26th, 2008 at 10:02 pm
Wow, I hope things get better! I exercise and get a pedicure - always works.
Just to throw this out there - what if you started a list to accompany the blog? Maybe that will help bring in more revenue?
March 26th, 2008 at 11:18 pm
Glad to hear you’re feeling better this week, Deb. It’s no fun being in a funk — I think we can all relate to feeling that way sometimes (I know I do). I find it helps to focus on the things I can control and try to let go of the other stuff. I’m sending positive thoughts your way!
We appreciate all the effort you and Jodee put into FWJ! Keep the faith.
Laurel
March 26th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Hi Deb:
You really put in so much work on this site that is a huge help to other people. I have gotten several jobs off this site. If money is tight, it might be necessary to start charging a subscription fee to help offset the costs.
Keep on keeping on.
Leisa
March 26th, 2008 at 11:47 pm
I am so sorry to hear that this site doesn’t financially pay off for you…I am off to click some ads right now!
March 27th, 2008 at 12:05 am
You are a good person.
I’m not. Not as good as you anyway. When I’m feeling really really awful…I find a blog about someone doing worse than I am and tell myself, “I can’t get to that point.”
Guess I work better with fear than hope at times.
Whatever works to make you feel better is what you need to do. Keep on keepin’ on!
March 27th, 2008 at 12:56 am
I’m a huge believer in the fake it ’till you feel it approach, but some days are definitely more challenging than others. That’s when using a pen to force a smile helps. Hold a pen in your teeth so that it’s essentially forcing you to smile. Your brain doesn’t seem to know the difference between a real smile and a forced one and it eventually cheers you up. Or you snap your pen in two, whichever comes first.
I love this blog and I truly appreciate all the hard work that goes into it. Thank you!
March 27th, 2008 at 1:16 am
I ama also very grateful for this blog — it has started me on a path toward a successful freelance career — I can’t thank you enough. I giggled out loud at Phil’s comment of yelling at the treadmill. I agree 100% that exercise is one of the best remedies for a poor attitude. I use it often and regularly both at home and the gym — sometimes getting out, seeing other people and changing my scenery works wonders on top of the exercise.
I often tell my boys to “choose a new attitude” when they are sour or neagative. Reminding them and myself that we do have a choice in that matter makes a difference to them and me. I also say, “Make it a great day!” in lieu of “Have a great day!” — a gem stolen from a friend that I’ve found does wonders.
March 27th, 2008 at 2:06 am
Deb,
I agree with the comment some one made. Maybe it’s time to charge for a subscription for leads, or something. I wish I could offer solid advice, but I know nil about monetization.
Will it help if we click on a couple of ads every day? Just a thought…
March 27th, 2008 at 2:17 am
Regarding a subscription based service - I think I’d lose 90% of my community if I charged for leads. That’s not really what this blog is about. I started it as a way to help others find jobs paying decent money. I don’t want to take that money out of anyone’s pocket.
I’m ok breaking even. After switching domains the traffic and revenue went way down. Now I’m almost where I was traffic-wise but the revenue took a major hit. I’m ok with breaking even, as long as I can pay Jodee so no one else will steal her away.
March 27th, 2008 at 3:14 am
Negativity is easy, takes no effort at all. The real work is getting and staying positive even when the world feels like it’s falling apart.
March 27th, 2008 at 3:19 am
I, too, am appreciative of all that Deb and Jodee do for us here. I’d pay a membership fee just to be able to take part in the conversations here, let alone the leads.
On another note: I guess I am a collector of maxims/cool sayings. I saw this on a church bulletin and thought it appropriate for our conversation here: Success is not playing the game with a perfectly dealt hand. Success is make the best of a poor hand.
March 27th, 2008 at 4:44 am
I tend to be very negative at times. I try to laugh about it. Harder now that I’ve quit smoking, let me tell ya, but laughter helps a bit.
Exercise does help. Getting fresh air. Doing something besides being on the computer. Remembering that no matter how stressed I am, none of it is all that serious…
I hope things will stay looking up for you and that the revenue here will pick up. And that Jodee will be here to stay, although I like to try to borrow her from time to time.
March 27th, 2008 at 8:10 am
This hits home - this morning both of my kids were so grumpy and didn’t want to go to school. It was a struggle to get them moving and it wasn’t a fun way to start the day!
After the kids were dropped off, I came home and worked out - it totally turned things around for the day.
March 27th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
I haven’r gotten any jobs from this blog, nor do I comment a great deal. However, I do come here to read a couple of times a week, and I’d have no problem paying $10-$15 a month for a subscription. It’d at least be a way to help offset the cost of Jodee’s salary.
March 27th, 2008 at 5:26 pm
Today’s my off day. I have a potential job opportunity, but now I’m reading the contract and the more I read the less happy I am. While the pay is decent, I’d have to install all new software and as is I have Word and Word Perfect already adding Open Office would just eat up more memory on my computer.
Then I also am uncertain on a two-hour over the phone training session. The first email said an hour training session which I might have been able to squeeze in, but two full hours is going to be hard to find.
Finally, they will only pay via direct deposit and want all of my banking information. For me that is the biggest hurdle. I was one of those affected by the theft of information through Hannaford and right now asking for my checking account information is not leading to a comfortable feeling. Yet, it is supposedly a reliable company asking for this information… I just don’t know why they changed to this PayChex system instead of Paypal as they first stated.
So I totally sympathize with all of those who have off days/weeks/months.
March 27th, 2008 at 5:41 pm
Oh, I can relate so much to this post. Anne Wayman once told me that if I envision it, it will happen. She’s right. See yourself being busy and productive and you’ll set yourself on the path toward that goal.
Glad you’re back in the groove.
March 27th, 2008 at 5:51 pm
I sympathize with you and your plight, and want to let you know that your blog is a very positive part of my day. I left a career to stay at home with my (demanding but wonderful) child, and have days that are overshadowed by negativity. Other than exercising, I find that finding prospective writing projects on this site actually helps my outlook!
March 27th, 2008 at 5:51 pm
@Wendy,
Grumpy kids? Wait til their teens. There grumpy on good days, bad days they’re unbelievable (thesaurus doesn’t have the word I want). I have two. I’ll take grumpy any time.
March 27th, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I want to thank everyone for their comments and emails and kindness.
I do want to say that though this blog isn’t making a profit, I’m doing fine. I’m not in dire financial straits or anything like that. I do have enough full time work to pay a salary.
So to clarify, FWJ isn’t making money, Deborah Ng is.
Thanks again for your support.
March 27th, 2008 at 7:03 pm
Ghostwriting a book about the laws of attraction was my first big writing gig and because I wrote it, I breathed it for several weeks and that’s when my writing career truly started. I regularly come back to that because it felt very intentional.
Whenever I feel myself sinking into the depths, I think about my attitude being the key to success. The day before yesterday I was feeling really down and pulled myself up out of it and yesterday 2 new clients knocked on my door.
It’s hard to stay positive sometimes but when you do, great things happen.
Deb, you deserve to make money off this blog. You help so many people with it! Not only have I gotten more than one gig from your blog but the discussions have helped me many times.
Cheers to your success and I’m going to go off and try to drum up some traffic for you with some social bookmarking
March 27th, 2008 at 7:28 pm
Ann G ~ perhaps you could open an account strictly for them to deposit and wasn’t used for other funds or monies? Once the cash was despoited you could move it to your private checking account. Just a thought.
March 27th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
@Lara- I thought about that, but after reading over the half dozen forms they sent me, one of them says you have to submit a voided check within 48 hours to ensure my spot doesn’t go to another qualified writer. I wouldn’t have final checks on a new account in that time frame. I also don’t like the push to get this information so quickly. Within the forms are papers asking for SS number, phone number, address, etc. I’ve decided it’s not worth the potential risk. They may be completely legit, but I’m not willing to give them that much information up front.
March 27th, 2008 at 10:57 pm
Ann G
Excuse my ignorance, but what do they need a voided check for?
I’m used to sending my banking details to clients, and have a basic savings account set up just for that purpose.
As far as I understood, the party transferring payment doesn’t need more than that?
It also sounds fishy to me that if they have two good writers to consider, they would decide based on who sent them their banking details the fastest.
March 28th, 2008 at 4:24 am
Keep up the “good vibes” y’all!
March 28th, 2008 at 5:39 pm
@Damaria - that’s one of my questions. I actually had to go into my bank yesterday - this Hannaford fiasco has led to all of our debit cards and one credit card being cancelled while new cards are issued, so I wasn’t in a good mood. Tried to buy something at a store that won’t take personal checks and my card was declined, and couldn’t get cash out the ATM either, so I ended up having to go get cash at the bank before they closed. Anyway…
While I was in there, I started talking to the teller about the deal. She said that any company who refuses to pay only by direct deposit is a big risk, especially when they’re asking for a cancelled check and bank acct. info. What’s odd is that this is a big company with many freelance writers, so I’d like to think they are legit, but the information they ask for is scary.
March 28th, 2008 at 7:17 pm
Deb,
Been in a bit of a funk myself this week, and when I logged in to catch up on your site this morning, there was this thread. It moved me to post on my blog about it and link back to it. Thanks and have a great day!
May 4th, 2008 at 1:06 am
Staying positive, in my experience, is an ever-renewing process for most people. We have events happen to us that we perceive as positive or negative and we have reactions to those events.
The good news is that we can learn to counter our negative impulses, reactions, and thoughts.
Our own issues are compounded with a daily bombardment of negative from the media. Different things work for different people, but we all must find a way to mount our own internal positve ad campaign to counter the negatives we deal with.
Just as we need vitamins to protect our physical health; we need to find ways to keep our mental health protected and moving in a positive direction.